HYDRO UNO

Service address Third carton behind the Arena
Billing date Yesterday DUMMY

Letter from the power company (aka The -Company- In- Power)
This letter was stuffed into the envelope with my electric bill this month....
Dear H1 CUSTOMER,
Hi ! Hope you are having a nice summer! How are you survivng this heat? You liking the air conditioning? Good thing we are NOT in India, eh! Can you believe it?...Power grid went down for days !
Just a little note to let you know we understand your feelings regarding recent price hikes for hydro service. Especially the huge increase you have seen since having your Smart-Meter installed .....(LOL)
We make no apology for the misinformation you received regarding this new technology, or for breaking our promises. C Mon , honestly, you did not really think your bill would go down, did you?
When you re-elected Ol Dalt..... we thought you had forgiven all of us too, for the years of fiscal mismanagement and bungling over at the former Ontario Hydro....and you know , since adopting the HST, we no longer have a consistant cash flow from the Provincial Sales tax to work with......and we have to get money somewhere! So the pass-through rates for Ontario Hydro Bankruptcy Fund (Debt Retirement Charge) are set to increase again......Cause....We just can not help ourselves. LMAO
And, you really, DO deserve it don t you!
But hey! Don t sweat it.... we know we are a big company and in possession of all the power, so you will pay what we tell you to pay, you have no choice. We have it, and you need it. So sad, too bad. Sucks to be you!
HAVE A NICE DAY! and keep those cheques coming!
Your Local Power Company President,
DEWY CHEATOM
CHEERS